A couple of weeks ago I suddenly learned how to stay upside down. I'm not being weirdly metaphorical here, the upsidedownness being part of my (nearly daily) yoga practise. The thing is, I've been doing yoga for years now, and I've never been able to do headstands. Or those crab things. Or for that matter most things involving significant upper body strength. I could do all sorts of things which came easily to me but somehow managed to forget to practise the difficult stuff, the stuff I didn't feel I had the confidence to try. As my yoga teacher pointed out to me, we all have a position which comes naturally to us, that we can't imagine not being able to achieve effortlessly, and the rest we have to work towards. It kind of helped every time I felt like everyone else could do something which completely stumped me, realising that I had my own secret power too.
When I was little I was always one of those kids who put the brakes on going down hills on my bike. I didn't get letting go or taking risks, I was always too frightened of falling off and getting hurt. I always believed that I was faced with a choice, either maintain complete control (and safety), or have the confidence to close my eyes and let go. Letting go seemed stupid and potentially life threatening, after all who knew what might happen, so my usual strategy was to walk away, telling myself I didn't like going fast anyway.
However, talking to a mountain biking addict recently, I found out something quite interesting. I asked him about his strategy for going down hills really fast (essentially his risk taking strategy), and what he said surprised me. According to him, there are a number of different elements to it: first to know and understand your body and the bike. To know what they are both capable of, and what their real (not imagined) limits are. Secondly to understand the terrain, noticing any potential dangers or diversions, being aware of the weather and the external factors which can impact on performance and safety. You need to go up in order to go down, and the hard work of getting up the hill focuses your mind, breathing and concentration, and makes sure that you feel you really deserve the thrill of letting go at the top. Finally, you need to believe that its okay to fall, even if you might get hurt, that making mistakes is as much part of the experience as the risk itself.
Not having "the confidence" to do something is the reason we give ourselves when we don't yet have enough information, understanding or skills to give it a try. When people look at the way I've built up my business, they often perceive me as being brave and risk taking, and whilst I'd like to prolong this misconception, it simply isn't true. The risks I take are calculated, based on thorough research, study and preparation (with a bit of intuition). I'm aware that every time I do something, I learn more, and do it better the next time. I know there are all sorts of things which come naturally now, which seemed impossible a short time ago. And I'm always open to the possibility that I might get it wrong.
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